Life is running away from me. I will barely be seeing my family in the next few months and have already barely seen them this semester at all. I'm overbooked, which is my own fault, but a problem nonetheless. Overbooking is generally how I compensate with stress, which makes no sense because it causes more stress. I've also had a cold since about 2 weeks into the semester and still have it, halfway through the semester. I've tried tons of meds. Last week I found out I have a staph infection in my leg, which could have become potentially serious. It's still healing up and it's coming along nicely. I was throwing up for 2 days straight due to some adverse reactions with some of the meds I'm taking. Everyone ostracizes me as if I'm a leper. I've had to miss a bunch of classes and am now failing at least 3 of them, I'm sure, which puts my scholarship in jeopardy and I refuse to allow my parents to pay for schooling out of pocket. I went home this weekend, mainly just so my mother would be assured that I'm not dying of staph, and I visited my grandparents. My grandfather's Alzheimers are getting really bad. What a terrible disease it is, stealing all recollections and memory a person has. It's hard watching the man I've grown up knowing as strong and stubborn, yet silly losing his memory. And he knows it's happening to him. I try to make him feel better by saying that sometimes my memory fails me too, but that provides little comfort. I've never been so scared for my family in my whole life. On top of all of this, my best friend and I aren't talking. And it's my fault. And I take full responsibility for it. It just took all this crap happening for me to fully recognize what I've done and what consequences I must live with now. I'm going on a mission trip on spring break, but I feel that I'm not even the right person to be going on this trip. I'm not in the right mindset. How am I supposed to tell people about Jesus when I'm straining to see him working in my life? Please pray for me. Please.

The Elite Eight Days of A Senior: Day Eight

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

I have taken upon myself to write about my last week + a day as a senior. I write a great deal on my own, but, sadly, rarely do I have the time to actually post anything that I compose on this lovely blog. My original intentions were to do the last dozen days, however inclimate weather (Now THAT's an understatement if I've ever seen one), addressing the ever so important documents that tell all my distant relatives that I've never met that I am graduating high school, and tidbits of homework here and there have stopped me from being able to pursue this project more aggressively.

I woke up this morning after having slept through a great storm. Last night were the Spotlight Awards for the Drama Department at school. On my way home, my main way home and next two options were made of flooded streets. It took me about 30 minutes to get home from school, which may not sound bad. However, when you take into account that I only live 10 minutes from school, that's a bit excessive. I woke up being unsure of the how accessible school was. My mother unfortunately assured me that the roads were likely mostly clear. However the right lane of Quince was still covered, but it didn't affect me because I do not drive down Quince to come to school. On the way to school, I listened to the new Foo Fighters album Wasting Light which my boyfriend was kind enough to lend to me the previous weekend. It was great. I cannot wait until the concert in May.
Anywho, I went to Bible. We're having those ever so fun sex talks. Isn't that awesome? And we often discuss the recent abundance of storms and Mr. Knight's recently acquired fear of them. In Government, Mr. Pritchard was not even supposed to be there, but he was there! He said the funeral he had planned on attending was postponed due to weather. It's not like the corpse is in a rush. He then informed us of this: "It's supposed to be sunny tomorrow, if we make it." We watched CNN Student News and chortled at the traditional Carl Azuz puns. Pritchard then proceeded with notes. However the sky grew darker and darker out. At one point, he said he was uncomfortable teaching in front of a large dark window so he decided to check the forcast. Class ended. I walk into the halls as usual, go to my locker and then to Speech class.
We are giving speeches right now on whatever topic we so choose to speak on. I had given my speech on photography on Tuesday. Today we continued with speeches. A great number of students were absent, so they were immediately assumed to have been skipping school. While this is likely the case with some of the students, I am positive that some of them actually are sick like they claim they are, believe it or not.

After Speech, came Chapel. Today was Spiritual Mentors chapel and I invited my Youth minister and father. My mother also came because the chorus was supposed to perform. I waited for my father to arrive for about twenty minutes. I never found him. However my mother and I sat towards the back of the auditorium so as to be easily spottable. He never found me, but apparently he was there. Chorus could not perform due to an unexpectedly long program and someone other than our direction made that decision.

I went to English. We tested over Wuthering Heights. It was truly riveting. Then sirens went off right after class ended. There was mass confusion, but we all ended up going to lunch anyways.

In Journalism, we are created hypothetical yearbook themes, covers, endsheets, division pages, and folios. I enjoy it a great deal. The big yearbook reveal is coming up soon. I'm excited.

In Acappella, we continue to prepare for our concert.

In Humanities, we watched Art 21 videos about modern artist. the videos are very intruiging.

I headed home after seventh period frivolocity in the J-lab. I addressed more Graduation announcements then picked up Noah from track practice. I had tacos for dinner. I made a short, but very happy call to my boyfriend. Then I picked up Denise and we, along with Noah, went to Germantown Church of Christ for one of our last Wednesday night performances. We did fairly well. We sang Nata Lux for the first time and I thought it was pretty good for a first time.

I arrived home a short bit ago, free of flooded roads and with a great deal of exhaustion.

And that was day eight.

This past week I was in Humanities class at school. Mrs. Efaw had these butterflies printed on paper. We were quite curious as to what they were going to be used for.

She shared this project with us.

http://www.hmh.org/ed_butterfly1.shtml

Then the next day she told us about one particular town: Terezin. It was intriguing. While she only intended to do the project with her eighth grade classes, she allowed us to do it if we wanted to. I'm way excited.

I hope I can go see the exhibit in Houston in 2013!

I'm with the wrong person.

I can't fix it.

I've broken one too many hearts.

One was too many.

I don't know what to do.

Dear God,

Help?!

I'm trying my best, but one person can only take so much.

Try living in my life for the past 3 months and then try making a sound decision on a life-changing choice.

"I can only bend so far before I break"

Currently in English class we are reading Mary Shelley's Frankenstein. We've discussed what it is that people fear. The problem addressed in the book is people are afraid of what they don't know.

I believe this to be true.

Right now, I'm scared out of my mind.

Wait, what?

jtarhMYajghakjnfaLIFEhagiauhuahISwenahanauhfFRANTICiahgajnaguat.

Slow down.

PLEASE.

Oh hey, look!

It's only Wednesday and I can already tell it's a bad week.